i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
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There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
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I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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