i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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