there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
