It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
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we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
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It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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