Sponge bath it is.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
