On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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