I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
and you fell through a lawn chair
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize