I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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