i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
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