I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
