I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
He? As in you personified your dick?
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Randomize
