Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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