She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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