i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
