so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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