I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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