Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
