bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
we're making bets on your personal life
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
