Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
