He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
