where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
