I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
