Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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