I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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