Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Sorry my hands just texted you
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
