I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
