Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
