i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Someone came in the potted fern
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Randomize
