It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
