they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize
