so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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