you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I need moral support for this bender
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
