no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
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I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
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If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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