I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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