i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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