i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
