All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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