yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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