On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
