If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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