ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
