I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
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