you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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