dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize