Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
