oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
