I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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