its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Randomize