We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Randomize
