I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
NoShamevember. You game?
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Randomize
