I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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