I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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